lastjinstanding | Brothel meme continued

Jingyi looks at Zizhen at first wondering if he doesn't seen the wreck that was their friend before realizing what he was doing. His gaze goes back to their friend, who definitely didn't look like this an hour ago.

Jin Ling really isn't sure he can handle any more. He's afraid to go back to his room because he knows he's going to immediately fall in bed with Yuan. He doesn't know if he can trust himself or the other man. The panic attack was so scary and.. and.. and..

Zizhen's friendly coaxing is like someone holding their hand out patiently to an upset stallion. Slowly the muscles tensed and ready for him to flee relax and Jin Ling searches his friend's face for a moment, asking the very same question he's been asking himself about everyone today. It was getting very exhausting.

He finally clears his throat and tips his head up. He comes over to the table and takes a seat. "Hurry up with your tea so you can drink with me." He plops the jar in the middle of the table and sets his cup next to it.

~~~

Wangji continues to play for a while. He lets the music affect the boy listening to him, giving him some peace as the Song of Clarity flows over him.

However, after the song wanes, he says simply. "Come join me."

Zizhen drains his tea with a grin and slides his cup over to Jin Ling - it's not so much that he is overly eager to drink, but the sooner he and Jingyi join in, the less of that jar the young sect leader will be drinking alone, and he doesn't seem like he's in a good state to be getting completely wasted. He's never going to forgive himself if he gets too drunk and acts the fool at his uncle's wedding.

At least there's plenty of time for him to sober up before the wedding itself.

He gives Jingyi a quick glance and then back to Jin Ling, trying to decide what question might get them the information they need without triggering his temper.

"Zheng-gongzi still resting?" He asks in the end, figuring it's an easy enough question to dismiss if Jin Ling doesn't want to answer it.

~~~

The lingering tension Yuan was feeling - about Jin Ling, about Xiaowen, about his situation - seems to ease as he listens, something calming about the song that makes everything seem a little easier to deal with. He feels at peace when it ends.

He bows deeply to the man at the invitation and crosses over to him to take a seat. Lan clan robes, exceptional skill on the qin, could this possibly be the chief cultivator himself?

"Thank you. You are exceedingly skilled, I couldn't help but be drawn to hear you play." He compliments softly "I am Zheng Yuan."

Ling fills his cup and Zizhen's before giving Jingyi a look. The Lan disciple glances between the two of them before also chugging his cup and passing it over. Normally he'd be the first to speak up, but he knows how easily he pushes his friend's buttons. Something was wrong and he didn't want to make anything worse.

So he gives Zizhen a brief, grateful smile for being the one to brave breaking the silence. Especially since Jin Ling's first move was to drink at least half his cup of liquor in one gulp.

"Yeah, I think so. I'm not sure," Ling answers unhelpfully. He cradles his glass, looking at it instead of his friends.

"Weren't you just in there with him?" Jingyi asks, carefully.

"No. I was talking with my uncle." Pause. "Wei Wuxian." Since, he has two here.

"Why were you talking to him?" Jingyi prods lightly. Who would go talk to Wei Wuxian (or any uncle) if they were in talking to someone they were clearly so infatuated with?

"To steal his liquor, what's it to you?" Jin Ling snaps, shooting Jingyi a glare.

~~~

Wangji bows his head in turn. "La Zhan, courtesy name Wangji. It's an honor." He quietly considers the young man for a moment. "Do you play?" He asks, gesturing to the guqin.

Zizhen sips his liquor slowly and tries to keep the frown from his face, though he gives a sidelong glance to Jingyi - it's clear his friend (and crush) is on the same wavelength as him. Something is very wrong here.

"How is your uncle?" He asks, dialling the interrogation back a little to try and lower Jin Ling's defences. If that doesn't work, he'll change the subject entirely until their friend decides he wants to talk about whatever is very clearly bothering him.

Maybe it will be a good idea to let him get a little drunk.

~~~

"The honour is mine, your excellency," Yuan nods, glad for the confirmation so he knows to be extra cautious of his manners.

"I do," he nods "I have been learning for the past year or so."

"Stupid." Jin Ling grumbles and finishes his drink. He reaches for the bottle to refill it. He'd really hoped Wei Wuxian would be easier to talk to. That somehow there'd just magically be some obvious way to share what was bothering him in a way that wouldn't be humiliating or childish, but of course there hadn't been. Granted, that really had a lot more to do with Ling than Wuxian, but it was frustrating. He knows he can't talk to Jiang Cheng about this, so he'd thought there would be a chance with someone less conventional but.. sadly, you still had to actually talk to explain the situation. Why couldn't he just know?

"Ever heard of a spell or moment when a person just can't breathe? Like.. there's nothing causing it. They just.. can't for some reason."

~~~

Wangji considers this for a moment before quietly turning his qin around. "Show me."

Zizhen does frown at that, tilting his head curiously. It's an odd question and he isn't sure what to make of it.

"Do you mean like.. if there's something wrong with their lungs or.. or like a panic attack?" One of his sisters gets those and they seem sort of like what he's describing.

Now that he thinks about it, she always looks sort of pale and shaken after she's had one, a little bit like Jin Ling does now...

~~~

"Oh..." Yuan is immediately intimidated to play in front of not only the chief cultivator himself, but also someone who is so clearly very skilled. He nods, though, and takes a deep breath. He's still feeling calm from the other man's song, which helps.

He takes a moment to get comfortable in front of the instrument and choose a song before he starts to play.

Jingyi is completely lost. He's pretty sure if he speaks, he's going to set his friend off again, but he's incredibly curious about what he's talking about. He also wonders if he can stick a talisman on Jin Ling's back to just the crap and make him start talking.

"No, not.. what's a panic attack?" Ling asks, still making a point not to look at either one of the guys he's sitting with. He's starting to think this was stupid and he should just go to bed. Too many people tonight were seeing him fraying at the edges and he needs to make that stop. He could find his calm again if he just tries.

"Actually, never mind." He looks up at Zizhen and tries to smile. "We should plan a night hunt soon for the four of us."

~~~

The boy had promise, Lan Zhan could tell right away. Between the song he chose and his ear for the subtle shifts in the tempo, the Lan Jade was impressed. He also was curious by how well Wangji, the instrument, took to the boy.

"No," he interrupts when he sees a misstep. "Keep your wrist loose. Go back a measure."

Zizhen is about to respond when Jin Ling dismisses it and changes the subject and he hesitates, uncertain if he should push the matter or not. He looks over at Jingyi, then back to Jin Ling and decides what the hell.

"Ling. We're your best friends. Whatever is bothering you, just tell us."

~~~

Yuan freezes when he says no, worried for a second until the gentle correction comes. He nods, determination in his expression - how often do you get instruction from somebody this skilled?

He goes back as instructed, replying the phrase.

His gaze drops to his cup, but instead of shutting down or erupting or whatever other bad reaction his friends might have expected, he blurts out, "I think I had a panic attack and it freaked me out."

Jingyi's going to write Zizhen a sonnet for this. "Was it something your uncle did" He asks as gently as he could.

Ling shakes his head. "No, it's.. I don't know what happened." Not entirely the truth, but he didn't want to get into that part of it. "I just couldn't breathe and I was on my knees.." He shakes his head. "What if something like that were to happen in front of everyone? They'd think I have a weak constitution."

~~~

"Good," Lan Zhan says with a nod when he does it correctly. He falls quiet again, listening. He doesn't interrupt again until the song is complete. "You have talent. Have you trained your cultivation skills, Zheng-gongzi?"

Zizhen is a little surprised when it works, but sometimes you just have to be blunt with Jin Ling - it's always a gamble, but he's glad he got lucky this time.

"It sounds like a panic attack," Zizhen agrees "sometimes having one doesn't always mean you'll have another, if you're under an unusual amount of pressure... but you can learn the signs and either prevent it or get away from people before it happens."

~~~

"Thank you," he blushes, ducking his head at the praise. It's strange, but nice, to get complimented on his playing. "Oh...I... I haven't had the... opportunity...."

He doesn't even know if he has the spiritual power for that sort of thing.

"Yeah, and who cares if others see it? We're more worried about you! Why are you under so much stress? You looked so happy with Yuan! He's such a sweetheart. Did something happen?" Jingyi asks, pushing things a few steps further.

Ling is torn between feeling flattered at how much his friends care and feeling the additional pressure. No, not torn. He just feels both and the added pressure is heavy on his shoulders. He shakes his head, but his focus catches on something. "You like him?" He asks, looking up. A bit of hope bubbling up. If his friends approve of Yuan too, maybe they could help him see if he's being played or not.

"Yeah, I do. I uh.. I don't know if I believe how you met though," Jingyi admits. He's a Lan, after all, so he can't lie. "Two dire bears? No injuries?"

Jin Ling scowls at him. "Who said I wasn't injured?" He holds his wrist out to Zizhen. "Feel how low my spiritual energy is! This is three days later!" Okay maybe he does have a little Jin in him.

~~~

Wangji tilts his head to the side curiously looking at the young man. "Do as I do." He places his hands in front of him as though they were holding an imaginary sphere, one on top and the other on bottom, sphere in the center.

"Clear your mind of everything else and picture your heart within your hands. It may help to picture someone who gets your emotions stirring or something you're very passionate about. Focus all that within your hands."

It was a simple task and described quite differently to young Lan disciples, but Wangji figures the boy was a little more worldly than some of those sheltered kids. It is to produce a ball of golden light from his core, assuming he had one.

Wangji believes he does. The boy doesn't seem mediocre to him.

Zizhen nods along with what Jingyi's saying - they're both concerned about him, and however much Zizhen has his doubts about whether or not this Zheng Yuan is on the level, he's not going to stop supporting Jin Ling for a second.

He's also not stupid enough to voice those doubts right now.

He does reach out to take Jin Ling's wrist though, and okay, his spiritual energy is very low.

"...maybe that's part of why it happened. You've pushed yourself too much."

~~~

Yuan looks confused, but he does as he's told, holding his hands in front of him. He closes his eyes so he can concentrate, but it's not hard to decide what to think about - his heart in his hands? Someone who stirs his emotions, something he's passionate about? It all leads to Jin Ling.

He focuses all his affection, his desire, his love, imagining channeling it into the space between his hands. It feels warm, and he can almost see the light behind his eyelids - his eyes fly open and he can see the golden ball of energy floating in front of him. He gasps.

"Am I... is that... am I doing that?"

Jingyi frowns. "Why are you lying to us? You suck at healing so whatever your spiritual energy is low from isn't from healing yourself."

Jin Ling glares at his friend. "I've had to get better." And that was completely true! "I helped A-Yuan on the way here when he was seasick and put him to sleep so he wouldn't suffer."

"You did what?!" Jingyi slaps the table. Okay, maybe he's had a little too much to drink. "You just gave yourself permission to control someone like that? Don't you know that's how cultivators can get really bad reputations! What if he finds out what you did? He'll be totally creeped out! Do you think you own him or something?"

Ling's expression turns stricken and he tries to get up to storm off, but Zizhen is holding his wrist and he's been drinking. He loses his balance and falls back down ungracefully.

~~~

"Yes," the faintest smile touches Lan Zhan's lips. "That's is piece of your golden core. You have a cultivator spirit and should be in training." Given how quickly he just did that, he should definitely be in training. "You would bring honor to the Zheng family."

Zizhen gasps - Jingyi isn't totally wrong, but to say something like that so bluntly without finding out the situation, he knows it's only going to cause trouble.

Which it does, but thankfully (he thinks?) Jin Ling doesn't manage to actually flee. Zizhen keeps hold of his wrist even after he falls.

"Ling," he says worriedly "Jingyi didn't mean it like that, you know that, it's just... come on, talk to us, there's obviously something going on, we're your friends, we want to help."

~~~

The glowing ball flickers and dies as he flinches at those words.

"I-I'm sorry," he apologises, dropping his hands "I was just.. startled. You... really think I should train as a cultivator?"

He tries to sound excited, pleased, but there's an edge of bitterness that he can't quite fight away - he knows that's not on the cards for him. He won't bring honour to any family, least of all his own, and definitely not the Zheng clan. It hurts to have something dangled in front of him like that, another opportunity he can't take.

It's really a wonder how these two managed to stay friends all these years without killing each other. Zizhen really has his hands full with their hot-headed personalities.

"You can't! No one can help!" He shouts at them. "There's no one but me!"

Jingyi put a hand to his heart feeling awful for what he said, but not sure what Ling was saying either. "You have your uncle-"

"I had an uncle. He tried to kill me. Remember? Also, what would happen to a small force like the Yunmeng Jiang Clan if someone went after them to get to me? He needs to focus on here and his new life with his bride, not on what's going on with me. I can't be that selfish." Not anymore.

~~~

Lan Zhan remains silent watching the storm of pain on Yuan's face and in his eyes. He knows the excuse is untrue, but doesn't care. It's irrelevant in comparison to the grief.

Zheng Yuan is being abused. Whether it was the clan itself or some other cause, obviously the Chief Cultivator doesn't know but he will. "Do you live with your family?" He asks carefully. If so, the Zheng manor is getting a visitor.

Zizhen stares for a moment, a little horrified - it's clear whatever is going on with Jin Ling has been building for a while, he's at breaking point and he feels totally alone, Zizhen can see that in his eyes, hear the desperation in his voice.

"Ling, you have us," he says, soft but certain "even if we can't share any of your burden, you can talk to us about it, maybe there's something we can do to help? The same is true of your uncles, you know... I understand why you might not want to share this with them, but I think they'd want to help you if they could..."

~~~

"I..." he doesn't know how to answer that, he doesn't know why it's being asked. He knows the Zheng family will cover for him if anybody asks questions that's the deal they have with Madame, but he doesn't want to say he lives there and for a visit to be paid, since they would find him very definitely not there.

"I'm very sorry, your excellency, I told Jin-zongzhu I would meet him before we retired for the night and I really ought to go or I will be late," it's a flimsy as hell excuse, and he hates that it might reflect badly on Jin Ling, but he needs to get out of there before any more questions are asked. "This was.. this was very nice. Thank you for your instruction, and your advice. I will.. thank you." He bows deeply and turns to flee.

He sighs heavily, his shoulders slumping. He put a hand to his forehead and reached to take another (much smaller) sip of his wine. "They would and then they'd get hurt, just like you guys. I really shouldn't even be here but I couldn't miss my uncle's wedding." There would've been way too many questions and hurt feelings from that. He never would've forgiven himself either, though if any gets hurt he likely wouldn't forgive himself for that either.

"And you guys are right. A-Yuan and I didn't meet the way we said. We were just introduced and we really clicked. I knew I was going to get pressured again for a wife and I keep getting put in.. some really uncomfortable situations.. I don't want to get into the details, but he's my date but he's also to help keep everyone off my back. I just didn't think I'd end up liking him as much as I do." It was scary how much he likes him. He gave Jingyi a glare. "And he trusts me and I wasn't creepy about making him sleep! He was really sick and hurting. When he woke from it and I told him, he was relieved and thanked me, you dick."

~~~

In a flash of white silk, Wangji was in front of Zheng Yuan holding a hand up to stop him. For those who knew him (which, Yuan was not) they'd know this wasn't aggressive since Bichen wasn't in the hand he was using to block Yuan's way. However, it likely didn't feel peaceful.

"Is Jin-zongzhu helping or hurting you?"

Zizhen definitely notices the comment about them getting hurt, but he decides not to push on that front - that doesn't mean he isn't going to absolutely get to the bottom of this somehow, because if Jin Ling is in some kind of danger, they're not going to let him go through it alone.

At least they're learning more about what's going on with Yuan, though. His explanation is still curiously vague, but it's far more believable than the two dire bears story.

"So he's sort of a fake date but also you actually really like him?" He clarifies, sounding intrigued "Maybe you should tell him, if he trusts you that much, you should trust him too and tell him how you feel.. maybe he feels the same?"

Yes, Zizhen has gone from being suspicious of Yuan to wanting to encourage this. He's a hopeless romantic.

~~~

Yuan stops short when there's a sudden flurry of white in front of him, almost yelping and very definitely cringing away with his arms half-raised defensively on instinct before he can stop himself. They fall, though, at the question, and the flash of fear on his face gives way to something that's almost indignation, his response is firm and immediate.

"A-Ling would never hurt me."

He could totally take on two dire bears! Sure, he'd have his ass kicked by it, but he'd be the one left standing-ish!

"It's.. sort of, but it's complicated. You guys really can't tell anyone about this though. Please promise me you'll help Zheng Yuan and I keep up appearances?"

Great, they go from talking about how he's physically in danger to talking about him needing to make a love confession. He also just gave away far too much information and his idiot friends could slip up and ruin him and Yuan.

"Are you blushing?" Jingyi asks with a snicker.

"No!" He was totally blushing.

"I knew you were smitten! I knew it! Didn't I tell you Zizhen!" Jingyi giggles. "I said, you two were being so cute together and you were being weird and gentle and- ow!"

Jin Ling is crimson as he dives around the table and tackles Jingyi like they were kids instead of full grown, supposedly mature, adults. "Shut up!"

~~~

Lan Zhan lowers his head and nods. "Good, that part is true."

He steps aside so Yuan can leave. However as he is almost past him, Wangji adds, "Your second practice will be here tomorrow after lunch. Don't be late."

"I promise!" Zizhen says immediately - Jin Ling is his friend, he does actually want to help him. Even if he does intend to get to the bottom of whatever danger he's in. And whatever 'complicated' means.

Right now, though, he feels as though Jin Ling has given them enough and he deserves the reward of some more light hearted teasing, so he giggles dutifully when Jingyi starts in on how smitten he was, and Jin Ling of course absolutely confirms it by tackling him, which has Zizhen breaking out into full on laughter.

~~~

Yuan nods, trying not to be terrified by that statement - has Lan Wangji seen through him that easily? How is he ever supposed to do this for Jin Ling if he can't fool a single person? Still, at least he's being allowed to pass, so he goes...

And nearly trips over when the chief cultivator speaks again. Second practice? Is he offering... no, outright saying that he's going to teach him? It's intimidating as hell and a terrible idea but it's also a literal dream come true from the chief cultivator himself and there's no way he's turning it down.

"Yes, Hanguang Jun." He agrees with a bow before he leaves.

He only really makes it as far as round a corner or two before he's leaning against the nearest wall with his eyes closed and sighing loudly. He doesn't know how to feel, but whatever he's feeling, it's a lot.

When Jin Ling leaves his friends later, he feels light in a way he hadn't in a very long time. He almost wants to go back to Wei Wuxian's room just to apologize, but there's someone else he wants to find instead. He's drunk, in a good mood, and he wants his Yuan.

After such a long and rough day, fortune smiles upon them. Jin Ling rounds a corner and spots the man in teal, gold, and white leaning against a wall. Breaking into a bright smile, he hurries forward. "A-Yuan!" He calls, quickly moving toward him. He slows as he notices the beautiful man doesn't look too happy. "Are you alright?"

[ooc: Lmk if you want WWX/ LWJ to talk!]

His eyes flick open at the sound of his name and he looks over to see Jin Ling rushing towards him. He feels a flood of relief and shame all at once, but the need for his comfort overrides all of it, and he shoved himself away from the wall and into the younger man's arms.

He hugs him tightly and buries his face in his shoulder, unbelievably glad at how happy he was to see him and horribly guilty as well.

"I'm sorry, I think I made a mistake," he mumbles, burying his face in Jin Ling's shoulder.

_{[that would be good!]}

Worry sweeps through him as he realizes just how long he's left the poor fellow alone. That had been incredibly wrong. He wraps his arms around his.. no, pet wasn't right anymore.. he wasn't sure what was. His something. Something precious.

Dread touches his heart at Yuan's words, but he rubs his back lightly. "It's okay. We'll fix it. Whatever it is, A-Yuan. It'll be okay, I promise."

~~~

Wangji returns to his room he's sharing with his husband. He knows how much it means to Wuxian when he realized his brother kept it the same all these years instead of redecorated like he'd claimed. It was another good lesson in how well Jiang Cheng hides his heart, but loves deeply. Wangji smirks to himself. If he wasn't so volatile he could almost pass as a Lan.

He steps into the room and crosses over to the table to start making tea, setting out two cups.

"It's not... I'm sorry, I don't mean to worry you, I can deal with it, I just need to..." he tries to explain, panic rising a little in his voice. He stops himself, clings to Jin Ling and takes a deep, calming breath. He knows he should explain properly so Jin Ling can assess how much of a problem this really is. He pulls back, just slightly, enough to look up at the younger man.

"I ran into his excellency, it was... it was very pleasant, at first, I complimented his playing and he asked if I played qin, he asked me to show him and gave me some tips on my playing. Then he asked about cultivation... I told him I'd never trained and he asked me to... he told me what to do and I.. I made this glowing ball of energy..." he can't help the tiniest hint of excitement that creeps into his voice at that, because he is still amazed he did it "he said I should be trained... but I panicked, I wasn't sure what to do. He asked if I lived with my family... I think he suspects something but I don't know what and he told me to meet him tomorrow after lunch for more practice and it's wonderful but I think he will realise I'm not what I say I am and-"

He takes another breath.

"I'm sorry. I'll find some excuse to avoid him, I just hope it will not reflect badly on you." That's the most important thing here, he can't give anything away, he can't ruin this for Jin Ling.

~~~

"Lan Zhan!" His husband might be a little bit tipsy. But he's been worrying about Jin Ling ever since his nephew left and he's very glad to see the other man back. He shoves himself up so he can drape himself over Wangji - intruding on the tea making, yes, but he thinks he'll be forgiven.

"Where have you been?"

Of all the people for Yuan to run into..

Still, he raises his hand and touches Yuan's cheek gently. "It'll be okay," he assures him again. "He sees a lot but he doesn't share much. His husband cares about me, so if anything they're going to confront me, but please don't worry. Whatever he suspects won't be public. As scary as he is.. and he is.. he might be the best person this to have happened with."

He leans in and gives Yuan a soft kiss. "And that's amazing you were able to access your core, lovely!" Lovely! He could use that one. Yuan certainly was lovely in every way. "I'll help you learn more and you can't miss out if he's willing to teach you something. I'd never hold you back from that."

~~~

Lan Zhan tries not to show it, but he loves the way his husband tends to greet him like an exuberant labrador. He moves one hand so he can wrap it around Wuxian's waist. It's both to guide him to his lap and prevent him from knocking things over on the table.

"I've been talking with Zheng Yuan, your nephew's guest."

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject